{"product_id":"2940013684423","title":"The Tachypomp and Other Stories","description":"A Mathematical Demonstration\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThere was nothing mysterious about Professor Surd's dislike for me. I\u003cbr\u003ewas the only poor mathematician in an exceptionally mathematical\u003cbr\u003eclass. The old gentleman sought the lecture-room every morning with\u003cbr\u003eeagerness, and left it reluctantly. For was it not a thing of joy to\u003cbr\u003efind seventy young men who, individually and collectively, preferred x\u003cbr\u003eto XX; who had rather differentiate than dissipate; and for whom the\u003cbr\u003elimbs of the heavenly bodies had more attractions than those of\u003cbr\u003eearthly stars upon the spectacular stage?\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eSo affairs went on swimmingly between the Professor of Mathematics and\u003cbr\u003ethe junior Class at Polyp University. In every man of the seventy the\u003cbr\u003esage saw the logarithm of a possible La Place, of a Sturm, or of a\u003cbr\u003eNewton. It was a delightful task for him to lead them through the\u003cbr\u003epleasant valleys of conic sections, and beside the still waters of the\u003cbr\u003eintegral calculus. Figuratively speaking, his problem was not a hard\u003cbr\u003eone. He had only to manipulate, and eliminate, and to raise to a\u003cbr\u003ehigher power, and the triumphant result of examination day was\u003cbr\u003eassured.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBut I was a disturbing element, a perplexing unknown quantity, which\u003cbr\u003ehad somehow crept into the work, and which seriously threatened to\u003cbr\u003eimpair the accuracy of his calculations. It was a touching sight to\u003cbr\u003ebehold the venerable mathematician as he pleaded with me not so\u003cbr\u003eutterly to disregard precedent in the use of cotangents; or as he\u003cbr\u003eurged, with eyes almost tearful, that ordinates were dangerous things\u003cbr\u003eto trifle with. All in vain. More theorems went on to my cuff than\u003cbr\u003einto my head. Never did chalk do so much work to so little purpose.\u003cbr\u003eAnd, therefore, it came that Furnace Second was reduced to zero in\u003cbr\u003eProfessor Surd's estimation. He looked upon me with all the horror\u003cbr\u003ewhich an unalgebraic nature could inspire. I have seen the professor\u003cbr\u003ewalk around an entire square rather than meet the man who had no\u003cbr\u003emathematics in his soul.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eFor Furnace Second were no invitations to Professor Surd's house.\u003cbr\u003eSeventy of the class supped in delegations around the periphery of the\u003cbr\u003eprofessor's tea-table. The seventy-first knew nothing of the charms of\u003cbr\u003ethat perfect ellipse, with its twin bunches of fuchsias and geraniums\u003cbr\u003ein gorgeous precision at the two foci.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThis, unfortunately enough, was no trifling deprivation. Not that I\u003cbr\u003elonged especially for segments of Mrs. Surd's justly celebrated lemon\u003cbr\u003epies; not that the spheroidal damsons of her excellent preserving had\u003cbr\u003eany marked allurements; not even that I yearned to hear the\u003cbr\u003eprofessor's jocose tabletalk about binomials, and chatty illustrations\u003cbr\u003eof abstruse paradoxes. The explanation is far different. Professor\u003cbr\u003eSurd had a daughter. Twenty years before, he made a proposition of\u003cbr\u003emarriage to the present Mrs. S. He added a little corollary to his\u003cbr\u003eproposition not long after. The corollary was a girl.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAbscissa Surd was as perfectly symmetrical as Giotto's circle, and as\u003cbr\u003epure, withal, as the mathematics her father taught. It was just when\u003cbr\u003espring was coming to extract the roots of frozen-up vegetation that I\u003cbr\u003efell in love with the corollary. That she herself was not indifferent\u003cbr\u003eI soon had reason to regard as a self-evident truth.","brand":"WDS Publishing","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47070253940976,"sku":"2940013684423","price":2.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0737\/7593\/9824\/files\/2940013684423_p0.jpg?v=1763583934","url":"https:\/\/shop-qa.barnesandnoble.com\/products\/2940013684423","provider":"Barnes \u0026 Noble (DEV)","version":"1.0","type":"link"}