{"product_id":"2940044391925","title":"Cats in Charge: A Guide to the Training and Education of Humans","description":"\u003cp\u003eHumans once worshipped cats. Tara, the world's leading feline expert on humans will teach you how to revive that tradition, one household at a time.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eTo help you become the god or goddess of your home, she has compiled the questions cats most often ask her and her answers. This book will teach you:\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHow to adopt the humans of your choice (while letting them think they chose you\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe use of feline martial arts to turn other animals' aggression against them\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe most effective way to conduct a hunger strike\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSocial networking the feline way: The actions that will get your videos on YouTube (and maybe a Facebook page).\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eUnforgettable ways to punish humans when they go away\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHow to make friends with a baby without losing your fur and whiskers\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe art of claiming their bed as your bed\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe complete guerrilla guide to resisting medications\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAnd much more.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFrom the book:\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAdvanced Bed Exercises:\u003cbr\u003eParty Time\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eDear Tara,\u003cbr\u003eBeds are bouncy! Dare I bounce?\u003cbr\u003eHappy Paws\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eDear Happy,\u003cbr\u003eIt depends. If you've had to go through a tedious process of getting accepted as a bed resident, I recommend that you wait to let the good times roll. If, however, your conquest of the bed proceeded with no opposition, bounce away.\u003cbr\u003eAnd don't ignore other bed benefits. One entertaining game involves taking up as much of the bed as possible.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAny enterprising cat can stretch himself so that to the groggy human, he appears to have grown several feet in length and width and to have gained at least ten pounds.\u003cbr\u003eImmobilizing the human by sleeping on his feet also provides much entertainment. It provides the additional benefit of preventing them from disturbing you by tossing and turning. A technique less frequently employed but equally enjoyable is to curl up next to a human's side and immobilize his arm.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBe sure to play the exciting attack game. This involves jumping on any part of a human's body that moves.\u003cbr\u003eAsphyxiation, which involves lying on a human's head, is also fun, but NEVER do this with a small child or infant.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eDon't overlook the fun of helping a human to change the sheets on a bed. To play this game, pretend that the sheet is your prey and attack it every time the human adjusts a fold.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"C. M. Barrett","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47074815475952,"sku":"2940044391925","price":1.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0737\/7593\/9824\/files\/2940044391925_p0.jpg?v=1763663141","url":"https:\/\/shop-qa.barnesandnoble.com\/products\/2940044391925","provider":"Barnes \u0026 Noble (DEV)","version":"1.0","type":"link"}