{"product_id":"2940045114370","title":"Heaven Is Not Like Carnoustie","description":"\u003cp\u003eColin Kelly, stationery salesman and self-appointed Arbroath Smokie expert receives a visitation from the Archangel Gabriel; or, as he is now known due to recent modernisation, the Archagent Gabriel. He is to be the prophet for the third millennium, the Vice President of Corporeal Communications.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eGod - now The Certain Eternal One (CEO) – hopes that mankind will heed his final warning and listen to the Word of Colin before it’s too late.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eColin’s wife, Sheila, convinces him to seek professional help when he reveals his new mission to her. She is less than enamoured by his new found notoriety, even if the sex is great.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe Devil stalks the earth, assured of victory now that all of mankind knows the mobile telephone number of the beast.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eColin’s Guardian Angel, Clarence, is left with the job of guiding him and helping him in the final battle for his sanity and mankind which takes place just outside Stowmarket, off the B1115.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse are approaching and they are quite damp, noticeably peckish, a little bit late and extremely pissed off.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eColin Kelly is our only hope. Can he save the planet? Are estate agents evil incarnate? Does the duck-billed platypus have a sense of humour?\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAnd do we have enough Hob-Nobs?\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThere really is only one place to find out.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Max Robberts","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47110011060464,"sku":"2940045114370","price":0.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0737\/7593\/9824\/files\/2940045114370_p0.jpg?v=1763673931","url":"https:\/\/shop-qa.barnesandnoble.com\/products\/2940045114370","provider":"Barnes \u0026 Noble (DEV)","version":"1.0","type":"link"}