{"product_id":"2940045361194","title":"Dad's Library Volume One: 27 Crappy Poems and Other Things to Read on the Toilet","description":"\u003cp\u003eWhat if you sat on the toilet every day and contemplated your life? Shouldn't you be entertained? The first volume of Dad's Library, 27 Crappy Poems and Other Things to Read on the Toilet, is just the distraction you need. Long enough to squeeze out a small turd, and short enough to be amused.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThis is a book you'll read every day: every day you poo. And if you are regular like the author, that probably will be every day. If you are not regular, then maybe reading some crappy poetry will help clear out your pipes. It's worth a shot. What else do you have to do on the toilet?\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAll the poetry is 99.16% crappy, GUARANTEED!!\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWhat does that mean? You will need to read this book and find out before the movie comes out. And what a movie it will be. Not only will it include references to poop, but it will also include multiple words for shit. Yes, that is right.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMaybe the movie will come in Smell-a-vision. Wouldn't it be interesting to compare how corn smells when it is processed by your body and your neighbors? Oh, the conversations you'll have.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAll because you bought the first book in the Dad's Library series. A bargain at any price!\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eCongratulations, you will never be without a conversation starter.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAnd there is more. But you have to buy the book and read it, digest it contents, and sit on the toilet to contemplate your reality in a world where a book of crappy poetry made you smile. Made you laugh. Made you bear down and give birth to a brown baby!\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHow old are you?\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAfter reading this book, younger than you thought.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIt's funny. Insightful. And will make your day a little brighter!\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Croyus","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47067418558704,"sku":"2940045361194","price":0.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0737\/7593\/9824\/files\/2940045361194_p0.jpg?v=1763678135","url":"https:\/\/shop-qa.barnesandnoble.com\/products\/2940045361194","provider":"Barnes \u0026 Noble (DEV)","version":"1.0","type":"link"}