{"product_id":"2940148368625","title":"Have a Nice Guy","description":"You don’t want a bad boy, my dear; at least not in the real world. You can fantasize all you like about a scruffy, Harley-driving, tattooed beast who does things you thought you’d never allow. But, you don’t want to meet him, because eventually he’s going to shit all over you, emotionally.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYou need a nice guy.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eForget that nonsense about how anything worthwhile is worth working hard for. If you wanted to buy a horse you could ride around the neighborhood, you would never opt for a wild bronco that would scream, thrash, and resist every attempt you made to civilize him. You’d go for the broken stud, and avoid a broken neck.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat’s why I suggest you recalibrate your penis-homing device. If you’re in a bar, and you spot a tanned God in a vintage T-shirt and sandals who winks and slaps your ass as he walks by, run away. Run toward that kind fellow over there—the one who has been down the aisle a few times, and learned how to behave.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eHave a nice guy!","brand":"Phil Torcivia","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47072755679472,"sku":"2940148368625","price":3.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0737\/7593\/9824\/files\/2940148368625_p0.jpg?v=1763702085","url":"https:\/\/shop-qa.barnesandnoble.com\/products\/2940148368625","provider":"Barnes \u0026 Noble (DEV)","version":"1.0","type":"link"}