{"product_id":"2940150145160","title":"Resilience","description":"By the time I was 19, there were three things I loathed more than anything; me, myself and I.  I couldn’t trust myself. I didn’t love myself. Worst of all, I couldn’t get away from myself.\u003cbr\u003eI consumed anything to flee from my feelings. Drugs, alcohol. Cigarettes. I hated myself for being so weak. For being powerless. I wanted to stop but couldn’t. Sobriety meant reality and that meant facing myself. That felt too vulgar. Too annihilating. Too utterly shameful.\u003cbr\u003eAnd then, my world collapsed. I understood at some core level that I had to change or slowly die. I decided to try to learn how to love myself. I chose to learn responsibility. I chose to create my life rather than letting life happen to me.  I literally had to relearn how to live.\u003cbr\u003eThe relearning was grueling. There were days when I felt like I wanted to cut myself out of my skin, the inner turmoil was so agonising and pervasive. But I hung on with sheer determination and ultimately the desire to live. \u003cbr\u003eI found faith in both myself and a higher power. I worked consciously and vigilantly to alter my thinking. I was blessed to have people in my life who loved me despite myself and who truly believed in me when my faith in myself wavered. I absorbed myself in positivity and slowly, the changes arose.\u003cbr\u003eAs trite as it sounds, love for one’s self is truly the only remedy for all our ails. Everyone has a purpose. Everyone is meant to be here. Everyone is important. If  I could so profoundly change my life anyone can. We just need to believe that we deserve to.","brand":"Halo Publishing International","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47122521489648,"sku":"2940150145160","price":6.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0737\/7593\/9824\/files\/2940150145160_p0.jpg?v=1763738825","url":"https:\/\/shop-qa.barnesandnoble.com\/products\/2940150145160","provider":"Barnes \u0026 Noble (DEV)","version":"1.0","type":"link"}