{"product_id":"2940169212273","title":"Southern Lady Code: Essays","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eThe best-selling author of American Housewife amp;mdash; \"Dark, deadpan and truly inventive.\" (\u003ci\u003eThe New York Times Book Review\u003c\/i\u003e) amp;mdash; is back with a fiercely funny collection of essays on marriage and manners, thank-you notes and three-ways, ghosts, gunshots, gynecology, and the Calgon-scented, onion-dipped, monogrammed art of living as a Southern lady.\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHelen Ellis has a mantra: \"If you don't have something nice to say, say something not-so-nice in a nice way.\" Say \"weathered\" instead of \"she looks like a cake left out in the rain\". Say \"early-developed\" instead of \"brace face and B cups\". And for the love of Coke salad, always say \"Sorry you saw something that offended you\" instead of \"Get that stick out of your butt, Miss Prissy Pants\".\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIn these 23 raucous essays, Ellis transforms herself into a dominatrix Donna Reed to save her marriage, inadvertently steals a $795 Burberry trench coat, witnesses a man fake his own death at a party, avoids a neck lift, and finds a black-tie gown that gives her the confidence of a drag queen.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWhile she may have left her home in Alabama, married a New Yorker, forgotten how to drive, and abandoned the puffy headbands of her youth, Helen Ellis is clinging to her Southern accent like mayonnaise to white bread and offering listeners a hilarious, completely singular view on womanhood for both sides of the Mason-Dixon.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSeveral pieces in this collection originally appeared in the following publications:\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e¿Making a Marriage Magically Tidy¿ in the \u003ci\u003eNew York Times\u003c\/i\u003e column ¿Modern Love¿ (June 2, 2017)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e¿How to Stay Happily Married¿ in \u003ci\u003ePaper Darts\u003c\/i\u003e (Winter 2017)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e¿Tonight We¿re Gonna Party Like It¿s 1979¿ in \u003ci\u003eEating Well\u003c\/i\u003e (November\/December 2017)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e¿How to Be the Best Guest¿ as ¿An American¿s Guide to Being the Best Guest¿ in \u003ci\u003eFinancial Times\u003c\/i\u003e (March 2016)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e¿When to Write a Thank-You Note¿ in \u003ci\u003eGarden amp; Gun\u003c\/i\u003e (February\/March 2018).\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Penguin Random House","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47104374243568,"sku":"2940169212273","price":15.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0737\/7593\/9824\/files\/2940169212273_p0.jpg?v=1763767754","url":"https:\/\/shop-qa.barnesandnoble.com\/products\/2940169212273","provider":"Barnes \u0026 Noble (DEV)","version":"1.0","type":"link"}