{"product_id":"9780615561981","title":"Delightful Reflections: Quips, Conjectures, and Pontifications","description":"This book features a number of ironic observations on life by an eccentric, absent-minded professor who exhibits an extreme fondness of alliteration and paradoxes. Many of the observations involve diatribes against offenses that few people could even have imagined, let alone committed. A rather \"dry\" sense of humor pervades this work, which is generously sprinkled with plays on words and what might most charitably be described as a \"novel\" way of looking at the world. One might reasonably conclude that the author harbors obsessions with ducks, Dachshunds, and doughnut eating police officers.\u003cp\u003eIf you enjoy irreverence and a novel perspective, you should keep in mind the old adage, \"Be careful what you wish for!\"\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eA few samplers:\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- Any residents of Washington, B.C. were most likely Native Americans.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- Proof found outside the pudding is likely to be much less messy.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- A minister suffering from laryngitis is in a poor condition to preach to the choir.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- The right to use bullet points may be guaranteed by both the First and Second amendments.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- Someone singing \"Do Cry for Me, Argentina\" is likely rather self-centered.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- Granting a child's Christmas wish for a hippopotamus would, under most circumstances, be somewhat unkind to his or her parents.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- Morally marginal individuals ought to be aware that what happens in Vegas may stay on Facebook and Youtube for a long time!\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- One would hope that a piece of textile with the message that \"Dog food is delicious\" is a dog coat.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- It is mean for parents not to allow their children to clean their rooms.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- It is really sad to hear one elementary school student bragging to another that \"My funeral is going to be bigger than your funeral!\"\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- Authors who are afraid of the dark should refrain from hiring ghostwriters.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- One rarely ever hears any objection being expressed to the comparison of pears and grapefruits.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- If Lynn Anderson suddenly has a memory of this, the decent thing to do is to record \"I DID Promise You a Rose Garden.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- If it does not look like a Dachshund, does not walk like a Dachshund, and does not bark like a\u003cbr\u003eDachshund, it might be considered deceptive to list it on Craigslist as a Dachshund without disclosing these material facts.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- A nun who wakes up the whole neighborhood while beating up a fellow nun for disturbing the peace needs a serious talk by the mother superior about goal displacement and constructive ways to deal with problem co-workers.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- There does not appear to be any support in respected, peer reviewed journals for the hypothesis that a pear a day keeps the dentist away.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- Cain may have been the first communist.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- To minimize the risk of injury, it might be helpful to move one's tongue before turning the other cheek.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- When in Rome, one should try to make a profit on the Romans.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- It would have been nice if Carly could have clarified whether, if attending a party on a yacht, one should walk aboard as if walking into a party or as if walking onto a yacht.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- Few people seen to question the authenticity of Bruce Springsteen's birth certificate.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e- If it quacks, but not like a duck, one might well be confused.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Eccenterrific Press","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":50088276721904,"sku":"9780615561981","price":8.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"url":"https:\/\/shop-qa.barnesandnoble.com\/products\/9780615561981","provider":"Barnes \u0026 Noble (DEV)","version":"1.0","type":"link"}