{"product_id":"9780692983997","title":"Loving to Fight or Fighting to Love: Winning the Spiritual Battle for Your Marriage","description":"IT'S NOT ABOUT WHO'S RIGHT, BUT WHAT GOD'S TRYING TO TEACH YOU BOTH.\u003cbr\u003e Join bestselling author Gordon Dalbey and his wife Mary, a psychologist, on this pioneering adventure through the wilderness of marriage conflict into the blessing of maturing faith and growing love. \u003cbr\u003e From sex and finances to in-laws and parenting, here's both tell-it-like-it-is truth for those with ears to hear and show-it-like-it-can-be grace for those with hearts to believe.\u003cbr\u003eFOREWORD\u003cbr\u003eEverything that happens in this world happens at the time God chooses.... He sets the time for sorrow and the time for joy. The time for mourning and the time for dancing, the time for making love and the time for not making love, the time for kissing and the time for not kissing. (Eccles. 3:1,4,5TEV)\u003cp\u003eIt was the Fight of fights. \u003cbr\u003eTempers blazed. \u003cbr\u003eFingers pointed. \u003cbr\u003eAccusations flew. \u003cbr\u003eShouts fired. \u003cbr\u003eThreats launched. \u003cbr\u003eFeet dug in. \u003cbr\u003ePositions defended. \u003cbr\u003eNo prisoners taken.\u003cbr\u003e\"You never...!\" \u003cbr\u003e\"You always...!\" \u003cbr\u003e\"I'm done!\"\u003cbr\u003e\"Fine! I'm out of here!\"\u003cbr\u003eAnd then the silence. The confident standoff. \u003cbr\u003eLet's see who blinks first!\u003cbr\u003eOne leaves for a friend's house that night. \u003cbr\u003eThe sun sets on anger. \u003cbr\u003eShadows close on distant, self-satisfied pillows. \u003cbr\u003eAnd eyes that do not close.\u003cbr\u003eNo problem.\u003cbr\u003eAt first. \u003cbr\u003eThen the sleepless justification. Vindicating re-hash. Sharpened barbs. Re-enforced defenses. A new zinger determined to mention next time. \u003cbr\u003eThe Accuser smirks. \u003cbr\u003eRighteously alone, the accusers examine their bedroom ceilings, anticipating. \u003cbr\u003eBut no call comes.\u003cbr\u003eSo what? I won the argument.\u003cbr\u003eUntil at last, seeping relentlessly through the brokenness, comes the fear of losing. \u003cbr\u003eEverything. \u003cbr\u003eWhat if we never...?\u003cbr\u003eLater the next evening, as husband and wife lie smiling in each other's arms, they turn to each other with a kiss and....\u003cbr\u003eWhat?Hold on! \u003cbr\u003eWhat is this, some kind of sadistic fairy tale? We're talking knock-down, drag-em-out brawl, and suddenly the two are making love? How in the world did that happen?\u003cbr\u003eI'm glad you asked. \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSo God created man in his own image...male and female he created them. Gen. 1:27\u003cbr\u003e Because God's image is reflected in man and woman united, the enemy of God wants to destroy marriages-most often, by making partners think the other one is the enemy.\u003cbr\u003eIT'S TIME TO FIGHT TOGETHER: NOT AGAINST EACH OTHER, BUT SIDE-BY-SIDE AGAINST YOUR TRUE, SPIRITUAL ENEMY.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSo that you will know the hope to which he has called you, and how very great is his power at work in us who believe. Ephes. 1:15ff\u003cbr\u003eCONTENTS\u003cbr\u003eForeword: It Was the Fight of Fights, but...\u003cbr\u003e1 Finding Your Voice: Starting Apart, \u003cbr\u003eFinishing Together\u003cbr\u003e2 In the Beginning: Why It's So Hard\u003cbr\u003e3 Never Waste a Good Fight: \u003cbr\u003eGetting a Third Opinion from the Great Physician\u003cbr\u003e4 For Better, for Worse: Letting Go of Judgments \u003cbr\u003e(Mary Dalbey)\u003cbr\u003e5 When You're Hot, You're Hot; When You're Not... \u003cbr\u003e It's Time to Talk about Sex\u003cbr\u003e6 Hurt People Hurt People: But Holy Spirit Heals\u003cbr\u003e7 Leaving Father and Mother: The Trailhead to Marriage\u003cbr\u003e8 For Richer, for Poorer: Whose Money Is It?\u003cbr\u003e9 Staying Focused as Parents: Whose Child Is It? \u003cbr\u003e10 Fire Prevention: How to Stop a Fight before It Starts\u003cbr\u003e11 Caution! I Love Like You: The Case for Grace\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e*\"Forgive us, Father, for turning away from each other instead of turning toward you.\"\u003cbr\u003e*Anger is pain masquerading as power.\u003cbr\u003e*God does not lift up one partner to humble the other; He lifts up Himself to humble you both.\u003cbr\u003e*With the capacity to judge, it's not far from Paradise to a fight.\u003cbr\u003e*Sexual intimacy happens not by trying harder, but by surrendering more deeply to God and each other.\u003cbr\u003e*Money exposes your values; that's why it's such an explosive issue for marriages.\u003cbr\u003e*When you let Jesus heal your childhood wounds, You don't need to act them out any more in your marriage.\u003cbr\u003eTRUE LOVE GROWS OUT OF GREAT COURAGE-\u003cbr\u003eAND GREAT FAITH IN THE ONE WHO ANIMATES IT.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Civitas Press","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47028284588272,"sku":"9780692983997","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0737\/7593\/9824\/files\/9780692983997_p0.jpg?v=1763619825","url":"https:\/\/shop-qa.barnesandnoble.com\/products\/9780692983997","provider":"Barnes \u0026 Noble (DEV)","version":"1.0","type":"link"}