{"product_id":"9780984858019","title":"Death by Tartar Sauce: A Travel Writer Encounters: Gargantuan Gators, Irksome Offspring, Murderous Mayonnaise \u0026 True Love","description":"The writer's maxim is Show, Don't Tell. So, here's a sample from Death by Tartar Sauce...                                                                                           Loser in Leukerbad  Some people travel so easily. They walk lightly on the earth. They exude peace and harmony. They hold onto their belongings.  I envy these people. I'm the traveler who loses his wallet, loses his guide, loses his way. I'm a loser.  Take my trip to Switzerland. As I board the United flight in San Francisco Airport, I suddenly realize I’ve left my shirt in Security. The flight attendant warns: “Not sure you can make it. Security’s a long way, and we depart in 15 minutes… with or without you.”  “I'm a runner,” I lie. And off I run. Fourteen minutes, 30 seconds later I'm back, gasping for breath but shirt in hand.   Then, in Chicago, as I board the airport train, I drop the backpack containing cell phone, camera and camcorder on the platform. A Black women’s quartet spots the disaster-in-the-making, directs me to the pack and holds up the train while I dive for my invaluables. Then, they serenade me with a sweet rendition of Just a Closer Walk with Thee.  I have always relied on the kindness of angels.  When I reach Switzerland, I make my way south on the country’s famously punctual trains. Two trains and a bus later — all on time to the minute — I’m in snowy Leukerbad munching on apple strudel and enjoying it so much that I leave my parka on the back of the chair.   The next day, after I've recovered the fanny pack I left at breakfast, I go snowshoeing.  The snowshoe experience is lovely and silent…except, what's that roar? A plane? A turbine? No — an avalanche!  It’s one of the most chilling sounds I've ever heard. Loud enough to rattle windows, long enough to make me consider my mortality.  And there's an intrusive thought: This town has been wiped out by avalanche before. No, wait — the last time was January 17, 1719. Guess I'm reasonably safe, after all.  After the hike, my fellow snowshoers and I head for Leukerbad’s modern ice rink for a quick hot chocolate and a long, competitive game of a sport I've made fun of my entire adult life.   Now, I'd like to apologize. Curling is not the incredibly lame, totally unathletic, funny-hat-on-the-head faux-sport involving brooms I took it for. There's considerable skill involved. Even that crazy brooming is kinda fun. Think bowling on ice. Picture croquet with a forty-pound rock.  But that night, I join a Leukerbad activity that makes curling look normal. It’s called “Kino im Pool.” I have no clue what that means.   I do as I'm told: Don a swimsuit and head down to the big indoor\/outdoor pool at the Alpentherme. As we relax in the warm waters, the lights dim, and a large screen fills with... James Bond. Yes, it’s Quantum of Solace. I've been to drive-in movies; this is my first swim-in movie...  So what do we have here? A perfect Swiss mountain village that lives on water. Some is in the form of snow; some as ice, and the rest in healing pools. How sweet it is.  And here's an inside tip. At the many-pooled Burgerbad, a.k.a. City Bath, swimsuits are required. At the tasteful Walliser Saunadorf, a.k.a. Sauna Village, swimsuits are verboten. Not discouraged — verboten. Unless you enjoy a stern lecture in Swiss-German in front of a lot of naked people, don’t bring your swimsuit.  Wasn't a problem for me — I'd lost my mine two days before.","brand":"BookBaby","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47072616939760,"sku":"9780984858019","price":2.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0737\/7593\/9824\/files\/9780984858019_p0.jpg?v=1763887768","url":"https:\/\/shop-qa.barnesandnoble.com\/products\/9780984858019","provider":"Barnes \u0026 Noble (DEV)","version":"1.0","type":"link"}