Nothing To Eat

CONTENTS.





THE ARGUMENT

THE PROOF--THE QUEEN OF FASHION

THE OBJECT AIMED AT

WHAT ANOTHER POET DID

HOW THE AUTHOR SOMETIMES DINES

MERDLE THE BANKER

PLACES WHERE MORTALS DINE

THINGS THAT MORTALS EAT THERE

THE INVITATION

THE MERDLE ORIGIN

MRS. MERDLE AT HOME

MRS. MERDLE GOES TO MARKET

THE DINNER-BELL RINGS

THE DINNER TABLE TALK

MRS. MERDLE DOUBTS PARADISE'S UNEATING PLEASURES

MRS. MERDLE DISCOURSETH OF THINGS EARTHLY

MRS. MERDLE DISCOURSETH OF THINGS EATABLE

MRS. MERDLE ORDERETH THE SECOND COURSE

MRS. MERDLE DISCOURSETH OF HYGIENE AND FISH SAUCE

MRS. MEEDLE DESCRIBETH HER DOCTOR

MRS. MERDLE DISCOURSETH AGAIN ON DINNER

MRS. MERDLE ACCEPTETH OF A SLIGHT DINNER, SUITABLE FOR A WOMAN
SUFFERING WITH DYSPEPSIA.

MRS. MERDLE DISCOURSETH OF WISHES AND HER SUFFERING

MRS. MERDLE DISCOURSETH OF PUDDING

MRS. MERDLE DISCOURSETH OF THE NECESSITY OF GOOD WINE AND OTHER
MATTERS

MRS. MERDLE SUGGESTETH THAT DINNER BEING FINISHED, THE GENTLEMEN
WILL SMOKE. IN THE MEANTIME, SHE DISCOURSETH

MRS. MERDLE, HAVING "NIBBLED A LITTLE" FOR TWO HOURS AT DINNER,
RETIRETH FROM THE TABLE UNSATISFIED

THE POET MORALIZETH.--HE DISCOURSETH TO THOSE WHO GORGE AND COMPLAIN

HE DISCOURSETH OF THE WHEREFORE OF BACHELORISM

HE DISCOURSETH OF WHAT SOME MORTALS LIVE FOR

HE IMPLORETH MERCY UPON THOSE WHO ARE CONDEMNED WITH FASHIONABLE
FOLLY TO MARRY, AND ILLUSTRATETH THEIR CONDITION

HE IMPLORETH MERCY FOR OTHER UNFORTUNATE BEINGS

HE DISCOURSETH OF A COMMON PRAYER

HE DISCOURSETH OF TROUBLE AND SORROW

HE MORALIZETH UPON WHAT A DAY MAY BRING FORTH

HAVING REACHED THIRTYSIXTHLY, THE AUTHOR IS ABOUT TO MAKE THE
"APPLICATION," AND PRAY FORGIVENESS, BUT CONCLUDES BY REMAINING
INCOG