Single Parenting – Becoming the Best Parent For Your Child!

Organizing
Challenges: Tension, stress, harsh words, conflict, fights, arguments, quality of family life
together, synergy, emotions that are rampant and patience wearing thin, upset at the smallest
little thing. Lack of focus and direction
Rewards: How you as a family can bond together and work through things, caring and
supporting each other, even when the going gets tough, making the bonds and connections
even stronger than before. Talking about things that are hard and how you are coping can be an
eye-opener, sharing perspectives and solutions very empowering!
Providing stability, order, schedule, routine and a firm foundation amidst uncertainty is a huge
responsibility BUT also an immense opportunity to reconnect with each other.
Getting, staying and keeping everyone else on track and organized, fed, clothed, taken care of,
on time, where they need to be, when they need to be, in clean clothes and staying sane in the
process can be quite the challenge for any single parent. The reward is that is provides you with
the opportunity to inspire, engage and mobilize your kids into and in your family unit. They take
part in building and shaping their own happiness, family life and future. That is the great reward.
A new start and beginning, possibilities and potential. Keep focusing on the positive as opposed
to dwelling in and upon the past. It is of extreme importance that anyone and everyone stay
connected, have a voice, speak up, communicate clearly and check in with each other regularly.
This is the perfect opportunity to help starting the healing process, strengthening the bonds and
connections between parents and kids, individually and collectively as a family unit.
You are the authority and disciplinarian in the family unit. Demand and earn respect, trust and
honesty. Be fair, open and consistent. Do not over-react and set some rules that you all can live
with in this new situation. Organizing and customizing your lives the way you want it. Who gets
to do what, when? Which sports and after-school activities, weekends and hobbies and more
can be discussed and decided together. The sole parent, guardian and champion of course has
the final say and input.
Single Parenting – Becoming the Best Parent For Your Child!

Do everything in your power to foster your children’s uniqueness and personality. Everyone has
something that makes them unique NEVER FORGET THAT. Encourage their self-sufficiency
and independence. Let them do chores around the house, take control of their lives and stop
acting like victims, try and play guilt-games or manipulate, disobey, rebel or act out. Teach
them to respect you, each other and others at all times.
How does your family (new) handle conflict, stress and crisis?
Are there verbal arguments in the household?
Can you still love and care for each other, despite the difficulty and or words that you are
having? How do you stay grounded and connected with each other?
Are there opportunities for the family and you and the kids, one-on-one to discuss how they feel,
what they want, concerns, disagreements?
Single Parenting – Becoming the Best Parent For Your Child!

New Family Unit
Challenges and rewards: letting go of the old and embracing the new, also involved moving
beyond the past, breaking ties and moving on. As mentioned earlier, this causes a lot of stress
and anxiety (especially for the kids). It is journeying into the unknown, uncertain and unchartered
waters and territory.
As a member of this new family situation and context, unit, everyone has a role to play and a
contribution to make. Whether you are in an only child or multiple children situation, you will feel
the weight of this one on your shoulder. These children's lives are entrusted and loaned to you
to champion, enable, empower and foster. You are all they've got. You are the one left behind.
Some children cope with changes, loss and upheaval better than others. NO TWO KIDS ARE
THE SAME.
Dealing with fights, rebellious behavior, bad grades, even isolation and detachment, can be
hard at times - especially if they are your own children. You can try and compensate for the
missing parent but never replace or bad mouth. Teach and model respect, forgiveness and
consideration, no matter how tough the situation. They are now looking to you for guidelines and
direction.
If you have an only child, you might see this as your ONE opportunity to get things right. Do not
put too much pressure and expectation on either of you. Enjoy and foster, grow your
relationship, bond and connection.
Being over-protective is the real danger here. Attachment and preoccupation is quite common
as kids become