Total Beach: A Surland Novel

The residents of Surfland, Oregon, face what might be the biggest thing ever to hit their beloved beaches: a killer whale.

But the whale only marks the beginning when it comes to the feeding frenzy gripping the town—and the problems gripping those drawn by the event’s wake, including:

• A lovesick teacher on non-maternity leave

• A noisy New Yorker perpetually double-parked in an erogenous zone

• A psychotic boss with terrible taste in children's cinema

• A weatherman in the midst of a stormy self-realization

• An RV worth more than some third-world countries, and

• Nineteen children scaring the wildlife back into the oceans (and a 20th child back into the womb.)

Another troubling conundrum in the Pacific Northwest's strangest town, and only one man can keep the insanity at bay: reality refugee Jackson Poe. Poe proves keeping his guard up and his convertible top down no matter the weather is no fluke. Be it a vomiting dog in the sky or a crazed surfer looking to hang loose—or noose—life on America's wettest edge once again becomes a Total Beach.

“Oregon’s answer to Carl Hiaasen and Dave Barry.”

—Sheldon McArthur, North by Northwest Books

“The best beach book of the year and maybe the best comedic thriller of the year.”
—Sheldon McArthur, North by Northwest Books, on Beach Slapped

“A non-stop laugh you cannot put down.”
—Sheldon McArthur, North by Northwest Books, on The Beach is Back

Barton Grover Howe is a bestselling author, humor columnist and stand-up comic. He currently resides in a small town on the Oregon coast within shouting distance of Surfland.