Descartes Meets Darwin in Podunk

(Short Story, Science Fiction; Plus a Bonus Story) When you run a diner, you never know who or what is gonna come in through the door. In other words, natural selection—what a racket!

Yes, indeed, when it comes to evolution, the disadvantaged species doesn't always roll over and die out. Where's it written that's what's gotta happen? Sometimes the endangered species engages in a little preemptive action. After all, who wants to become extinct?
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