Found a King

Basking in the afterglow of my clandestine affair, in the pale moonlight casting shadows on my face through the leaves, I lounged like an empress on the forest ground. What I had done just a few moments ago was beyond my wildest, most erotic fantasy. I had felt it all, all the energy, the intensity erupting inside me, like a thousand cannons being fired at the same time, I had experienced it just the way I had imagined, with the right person. Would I regret it in the future? Yes! I regretted it that very moment but it was like guilty pleasure. No! Not guilty, because I did it knowingly. I had indulged, in the wrong thing. I always did.
Lydia Carmen, I was the most mystical girl in college, I still can’t help it. I was always exposed to temptations, I always indulged in the wrong, most clandestine, sinful and immoral things and I did it knowingly. But what else could I do, it’s the only way I managed to live with myself. Indulgence, if I didn’t let myself go, if I didn’t loose myself in something, I would go crazy. It was very hard to live with the type of person I was, a cast out, always struggling to materialize into something the society would appreciate and accept. But it wasn’t about that, I was who I was. I considered myself an artist. I loved art, music and sex, why? Because I could indulge in these things freely, I bore no prejudice, no judgments, but endless freedom when I indulged. No one liked me, even considered me. Except a few boys who had just wanted to get into my pants, let’s face it, I was pretty, regardless of everything else. But with Royce Maxwell, it had been something completely, utterly different.