"Ride That Horse to the Frickin' White House"... With Groucho Harpo Chico Nixon

Nixon’s Ghost is still ‘The One’
Dick’s Lessons to Get Back on the Horse

STORIES OF MAGICAL REALISM…
Nixon’s Ghost stands for something absurd but near-great. Ride a horse to save America. Married women and an elected dork watch as a near-great crook resigns from Limbo to emcee the first-ever White House ‘Lame Duck Masquerade Ball.’ And ya better listen, cuz America doesn’t not have Nixon to not kick around anymore.

STARRING…
The ever-charming athlete-and-soldier Lori L Lewis, and her webcam-stripper wife, December Carrera.

AND…
Councilman-elect Larry van der Bix, the dork who dumped lottery winnings into an absurd election victory while his best friend endured an invisible war.
WITH GATHERED ALLIES…
General Allen Goodwrench, Lori’s boss, who must battle a bomb-throwing presidential candidate… Major Rusty Chops, who will get back on a horse after helping a female soldier survive an invisible war… Soldiers Cazzie Clark & Gene Gonzales, who learn the worst battles sometimes happen in a bedroom… Senator Mary Elisa Traynor, of Hawaii, who understands that the world will always cherish lovers… And… a strong-willed teen, a protective mom, and three gay Eager Scouts, on a cavalry to cross America… Plus… The cross-country horseback guru, Lisa Steele, who could be Marilyn Monroe, but isn’t.

IN A POLITICAL NOVEL FEATURING…
Nixon’s Ghost, because if he teaches how to be ‘Near Great,’ he gets to emcee a big White House party… With… A violent sexual predator, Senator Jock Thugmeat, whose brutal attacks are still never invisible… Plus… President Barack Obama (wait, huh?), who isn’t an ugly duckling… Joseph F. Biden, Jr. (‘F.’?) who wears a leather jacket and sez, ‘Hey-y-y-y!’ … And… Russia’s Vladdie Vlad Vlad, who can’t smile, even when dead Communists trip a compassionate clown... John F. Kennedy and Marilyn Monroe, ghosts who meet again inside the White House… Bill and Hillary, dressed in a two-person horse costume, because one is an ass… and Will Rogers, who knows it’d be ‘Near Great’ to make America laugh again.

SIMPLY AN UNSIMPLE LOVE STORY…
Dick knows… that it’s always a beautiful day… for a White House wedding.
IN A NOVEL BY
Bill Orton

AUTHOR’S NOTE…
America is a deeply divided nation.
Our people used to work together. We won wars.
Now, we yell at each other. We don’t listen. The truth is hiding.
“Love & Hate in America” is not an answer, but just absurd political commentary.
If Nixon’s Ghost looks pretty darned good, then it suggests that we are falling down a mountain.
But when Americans yell and slap and fall off a cliff, Nixon’s Ghost is looking ‘Near Great.’
Use time, or lose it. Elections happen in real time, and then they’re done. Just ask Dick.
He’s the emcee for the first-ever White House ‘Lamb Duck Masquerade Ball.’

POLITICAL MAGICAL REALISM

-- Does it matter who gives ‘Near Great’ advice?
-- What if a dead president refuses to leave you alone?
-- And what if Richard Nixon keeps telling you what to do?
-- “So what’cha gonna do? Time keeps ticking. Ya better do it.”
-- Maybe it’s really not a ghost
-- Hopefully it’s just some funny story
-- Or Maybe America’s long national nightmare is back.