How to Annoy a Groundhog

What would happen if Santa ran afoul of U.S. federal regulations? What will the government tax when its goal of wiping out all vices is finally achieved? Are we really an illiterate "Nation at Risk"? How accurate is pop psychology?

These questions and others are asked and answered in op-ed pieces by Charles Wesley Orton initially published in the Orange County "Register," the San Diego "Union-Tribune," and other newspapers from 1985-1996.