The Chizzel House of Horror Presents: Good Old Norman Part 1

These two stories inspired by the Hammer House of Horror, are tongue in cheek horror for the wellbeing curious using the old but also very new category of Enceefulness.
In story 1, John Smith and his wife Tina are wealthy pig farmers and live in a Gothic castle overlooking the village of Crackledale; their products are very popular, hence their wealth.
They though, have a problem, they have no son to inherit their yummy wealth and take over the business (then sell up and spend half his wealth on women, alcohol and fast cars; and waste the rest).
John is a fan of Mary Shelley and loves her novel, Frankenstein; which he likes to re-read; makes a change from Lord of the Rings anyway.
John has a man-cave lab in his castle just like the one which Victor Frankenstein had.
The rest is too horrible to tell you.
Story 2: Dracula is a legend, based on Vlad the Impaler. Not so long ago there was another stealer of blood in Bucharest, Transylvania (you won’t have heard of him). This annoyed Vlad the Mayor so much, he persuades the local Doctor. A Mr Van Leasing, Vampire hunter to go and sort out the evil Count with a stake a hammer, some holy water and, a very special vampire hunter’s candle holder.