1
/
of
1
Seaboard Press, an imprint of J. A. Rock & Co. Pub
My Bucket List Has A Hole In It
My Bucket List Has A Hole In It
Regular price
$3.99 USD
Regular price
Sale price
$3.99 USD
Shipping calculated at checkout.
Quantity
Couldn't load pickup availability
FROM THE BOOK
There are a lot of problems in this world. Many things to worry about. Global warming, nuclear proliferation, who is stealing my underwear ... what? Yes, nuclear proliferation belongs on my list. It is a big deal! Oh, my underwear? That may be the biggest mystery of all.
I keep buying new packages of four of a certain brand of underwear. I am the only person in this house who wears that size or type or color. After the laundry is done I usually have one of the four pairs left. What's up with that? Eventually, even that one pair will disappear as well. I have bought twelve pairs of new underwear in the past three months. Where have they gone? Somebody has a crapload of new boxer briefs in their house, but it ain't me.
***
Recently I was in a group of people who were talking about age when one gentleman said, "You're in your fifties, right?" How dare him! How could he possibly think that I am anywhere near fifty! I was so hurt! Then, a few days later there was this elderly woman who said I looked just like some preacher she watches on TV! She could not recall his name, but she left me wondering what devilishly handsome man she could be talking about.
***
It has been hot. Over 100 degrees at times. I have been running from air conditioned car to air conditioned house all week. I feel sorry for those who do not have that luxury.
I do not feel sorry for the guy I saw jogging about one o'clock Thursday afternoon when the thermometer said it was 98 outside, or for the dummy I saw mowing her grass that same afternoon.
There are a lot of problems in this world. Many things to worry about. Global warming, nuclear proliferation, who is stealing my underwear ... what? Yes, nuclear proliferation belongs on my list. It is a big deal! Oh, my underwear? That may be the biggest mystery of all.
I keep buying new packages of four of a certain brand of underwear. I am the only person in this house who wears that size or type or color. After the laundry is done I usually have one of the four pairs left. What's up with that? Eventually, even that one pair will disappear as well. I have bought twelve pairs of new underwear in the past three months. Where have they gone? Somebody has a crapload of new boxer briefs in their house, but it ain't me.
***
Recently I was in a group of people who were talking about age when one gentleman said, "You're in your fifties, right?" How dare him! How could he possibly think that I am anywhere near fifty! I was so hurt! Then, a few days later there was this elderly woman who said I looked just like some preacher she watches on TV! She could not recall his name, but she left me wondering what devilishly handsome man she could be talking about.
***
It has been hot. Over 100 degrees at times. I have been running from air conditioned car to air conditioned house all week. I feel sorry for those who do not have that luxury.
I do not feel sorry for the guy I saw jogging about one o'clock Thursday afternoon when the thermometer said it was 98 outside, or for the dummy I saw mowing her grass that same afternoon.
Share
