Metapunctuation: When a Comma Isn't Enough

DON'T STOP WITH THE PERIOD

The richness of English comes from its enormous vocabulary—upward of a million words. But how many punctuation marks are available to help communicate all the subtlety and nuances of the language? A piddling handful of tired, overworked dots, dashes, and devices that fall short when it comes to delivering the written word as the writer intended it. Metapunctuation, the product of the brilliant if somewhat askew mind of Lewis Burke Frumkes, adds the absent flair and precision, ends ambiguity, and makes manifest all of English's unspoken jabs, frowns, inflections, passions, and innuendos with marks such as:

• phobic brackets to enclose fear gone wildly out of control
• infatuation marks to indicate a frivolous kind of love
• ring of indignation to really let 'em have it
• pasion waves for prose ranging from purple to blue
• contempto-drips for utter disdain