Surgical Imposter

The imbibing country clubbers were tooting their New Years Eve miniature

horns, prematurely. An elderly man at the adjoining table is obviously

choking on an under chewed piece of steak,

Jason hollers, “can you talk?” The gasping man shakes his head, “no!” The

Heimlich maneuver fails. Jason yanks the tablecloth and the dishes crash to

the floor.

He lifts the cyanotic, gasping man to the table with his head extended over

the edge. He remembers Dr Heifer’s words “The most important thing to

remember in performing a tracheotomy is to extend the neck and the trachea

will project forward.”

He grabs a steak knife, makes an incision into the wind pipe below the voice

box and inserts a horn as a make shift tracheotomy tube.

With each breath, the tooting horn improves the color of the man from blue

to pink and ushers in the New Year.