Finnegan's Wake

That’s me over there. I’m the one who looks like the science fair project. I’m lying in the bed hooked up to all the machinery. My name is Willie—well, really, it’s Wilma. But honestly, who names a baby Wilma? When the car with me locked in the trunk was pulled from the river, one of the investigators said I was lucky. I’m not the kind of person that ends up in a hospital bed—let alone in a coma! Now the trick will be the following: how do I get out of the bed and back to my life? While we’re waiting, I might as well share my story with you.