What's a Schmuck / Kosher Baseball

Oddly, schmuck is a German word. An adjective meaning “attractive,” or a noun meaning a piece of jewelry. But the Yiddish or Jewish use of the word means almost the opposite. It is a word meaning penis or prick, but is frequently used to indicate an obnoxious or contemptible person. I got interested in the word myself from a Yiddish buddy of mine, who admired Mel Brooks the actor and movie producer-director. My Jewish friend is a rare blend of humorist and intellect — Barry Hyman — a tall, well-built former professor of Mechanical Engineering at the University of Washington. Barry keeps me laughing — a truly therapeutic experience.

Barry and I used to toss the baseball back and forth and then sit and chat for long moments. On one occasion, he presented me with a paper oddly titled “Save the word Schmuck” and written by Mel Brooks. After his movie Blazing Saddles, I had come to admire Mel as a premier humorist. My interest in the word lingered, and led me to think about situations where the word would surface in a social environment, during verbal encounters. “A real schmuck, such a schmuck already, that guy doesn’t know diddly shit — a total schmuck,” are some examples.

To try and put things into perspective, trying to “describe” the word schmuck is like trying to portray or depict a sunset or a rainbow while getting soused during your grandson’s Bar Mitzvah.

So, anyway, read on my noble friend. I hope you enjoy and may your days be merry as you encounter many schmucks.