The Obliterated Nipples of Kate Bee

Kate Bee - primary school teacher. As in, a practical, intelligent human being who can be trusted with the well-being of small, dependent people. Her first child with soulmate Dave is very much wished for. Anticipated. Planned.

And then.

Thrown, after a mere thirty seven and a half hours of labour, face first into an abyss of unscheduled disorder, furtive public breastfeeding, told-you-so's and a never ending, twitching inducing carousel of poo smeared press-stud fastening; it turns out that the reality of motherhood has overnight plonked its huge, great gruelling stain slap bang in the middle of Kate's idyllic pre-natal imaginings.

Thank God for new pal Debbie. Beyond her tousled, sexy exterior she's just a disillusioned fellow Mum, who offers Kate the recognition and understanding she has come to so desperately crave. She's the only person in Kate's life who gets it.

Right?